Over the last couple weeks my older son, Wally, has been learning many things in this his second year of school. He's in Pre-Kindergarten, for 4 year olds, called Pre-K 4 to those of us in a parental status. Wil, my second son, is in Pre-K 3, at another school. Well, Wally's got some great teachers at the school he's going to, and I'm really impressed with the education he's receiving.
Wally is a rather late talker, with some big hurdles to overcome with his speech, so he goes to a school that caters to children of all types, with perfectly average kids to those with serious autistic tendencies, and while Wally really has only the speech to work on anymore, he's learning how to deal with conflicts with other children that have some real communication issues beyond just their speech.
Wil is going to a local private school. He hasn't exhibited the severe speech delay that his older brother has, and I really wanted him to blossom into his own person, not just live in the shadow of his big brother, so I wanted him to go to a school that still has music and arts as part of the regular curriculum, which sadly just isn't addressed in the public school system for most of this country anymore. But I digress...
Wally's education in conflict resolution, or how to get along with everybody, comes down to a lesson that I don't remember ever getting when I grew up. I do have to admit that while it sounds a bit strange, it does in fact lighten the mood of all those involved. See, the way it goes is this: Two kids have an argument about whatever kids fight about, like the one Thomas train in the whole toybox while there's 50 Gordons. Anyway, ultimately these kids get to yelling and grabbing and so on. This is where the new school of thought comes in, and the preferred way to deal with it comes down to 2 things, an apology and a compliment.
A scenario for this might play out about like this...
Boy 1: [seeing another boy has the toy he wanted] "I wanted that toy!"
Boy 2: [defending his posession] "No, it's mine!"
Boy 1: [grabbing the toy] "I said I wanted it!"
Boy 2: [taking a swing at boy 1] "Unh!" (that's supposed to be that mean grunt)
The teacher steps in at this point and breaks things up, hopefully figuring out who actually had the toy first and then has the child that took the toy apologize for what he did, and then he has to give the other child a compliment. Sounds like this:
Boy 1: [to boy 2] "I'm sorry I took that toy, and I like your shirt."
I am not a child psychologist, so I don't know the reasoning for this kind of communication, but in my own home it's made for some interesting entertainment. We never know what one son is going to say to the other one when we use this tactic to resolve a conflict between siblings.
So, Melanie's picking up Wil from school the other day, like she does every afternoon, and as is the normal practice for the preschoolers, they walk each child out to the waiting vehicles from the safety of the building. The parents queue up their minivans and station wagons, pull up to the specific stopping place and wait for their child to walk to the vehicle hand in hand with a teacher or assistant. As Wil is getting into our car he slips and stumbles into the back seat, and without a moment's hesitation he says to his teacher, "Oh, sorry!" and then adds," I like your underwear."
Apparently Melanie, who seldom has nothing to say, found herself at a complete loss for words.
Cinnamon Wine
6 days ago





